Divorce Recovery Specialist
I am a Divorce Recovery Specialist having acquired the skills and qualifications necessary to assist a person as they transition through the life change of divorce.
I am a Professional Divorce Mediator, but I use those skills in the capacity of Divorce Coach to help explain the divorce process to individuals or couples. I can assist them during the divorce, by simplifying and explaining the legal system and how to navigate negotiating a fair agreement. I can help them in Mediation either as a couple or individual by offering times outside of Mediation where I teach them how to mediate and how to work together.
As a Co-Parenting Coach, my skills involve a keen understanding of the needs for Couples to work together to ensure minimal impact of the divorce on the children. Building a relationship post-divorce with your former spouse is possible! I work by helping the person individually at first discover their unhealthy patterns of resolving conflict and I empower them by training them to be Mediators so they can negotiate any conflict in a healthy manner. Then I bring the couple together and we devise a Co-Parenting Plan that has proven successful in every couple I have met!
"Best Interest" Coaching
Understanding what is in the best interest of the child is key because it is the standard that the Courts use in determining if the parent is putting the needs of their children ahead of their own. The Court system requires you to attend a Seminar to learn how to parent a child experiencing the life altering change of divorce . I can teach you what a child needs at an each age level in order to minimize the collateral damage that divorce has on their emotional well being. I am skilled at this and can help you become skilled at it too!
WHY DO I NEED A DIVORCE COACH???
I can help you discover, maybe for the first time, how you handle transitions in your life that occur and this will help you determine how you want to live your life after divorce. Maybe you feel "stuck" or "frozen" like you just can't move forward in your life, or you feel that you are about to divorce and you don't know how you are going to be happy again. If you have been going to therapy for years and you still don't feel as if you are getting anywhere, give coaching a try!
I don't charge you to "tell your story", the real work begins when we figure out how to end your story, so you can stay out of your past and step into your future!
I have to thank Michele for her compassion, kindness, support, availability and encouragement. Without her cheerleading and guidance, I wouldn’t be ready to fly. There was never judgment from her—there was only validation in a safe place to cry, vent, and listen and learn. The wisdom and tools that Michele shared with me will continue to guide me in my lifetime. I am on my way into becoming the better, happier, healthier woman with boundaries that I once was and will become again! Thanks Michele!
--Nancy, Monmouth County, NJ
WHY WORKING WITH ME FIRST-- AS YOUR DIVORCE COACH,
BEFORE CONTACTING AN ATTORNEY OR MEDIATOR,
SAVES YOU MONEY!
Hiring me as your coach gives you the benefit of having two services for the price of one. I not only have coaching experience, I am also a Professional Divorce Mediator. I received my training from the New Jersey Association of Professional Mediators (NJAPM). As an even added bonus, I am also a certified Paralegal from the American Bar Association. I have decades of experience in the legal field. I am also divorced and have represented myself in at least a dozen post-judgment enforcement applications and have been "successful" in most of them (not that anyone ever really "wins"). I can coach you BEFORE you contact an attorney and we can come up with a "game plan" ahead of time so you don't waste countless hours telling "your story" and racking up your legal bills. Sometimes you just need to vent and that's OK! But what happens is you turn your appointment with your attorney into a therapy session and you waste time and money talking to your attorney about non-legal issues when you could be talking to a Coach, like myself, who costs less per hour and can help you come up with a strategy that maximizes the time you spend with your attorney so that it is more productive. I can help you navigate the legal process as a Paralegal with knowledge of the Court system and because I've gone through the process personally and I understand how it works and can explain it to you! I can't offer you advice or promise you an outcome. What I can do is help you reign in your emotions and maximize rational thought so that you enter your appointment with your attorney -- ready to tackle the issues and come up with solutions. In-office appointments are $200 for a one hour session. Attendance at Mediation sessions are $200 for a one hour session.
POST - DIVORCE COACHING FOR COUPLES
Now that your divorce has ended in an agreement, you know that the more emotion you allowed into that process, the more money you spent. If you were able to be business-like in your negotiations and interactions with the attorneys, mediators, judges and your former spouse, your cost was minimized. That is because the process of getting divorced is a venture with your former spouse that is no different than the dissolution of a partnership in business. Being able to keep it business-like is key! It tempers the emotion and allows rational thought to come into play. When you can adapt to this mindset, instead of using your attorneys as therapists, or friends, you begin to develop a business-like mindset that will save you time and money.
As your Divorce Coach, post-divorce, I can help you learn and master the following skills so that you can use them now to create a successful, harmonious and working coparenting relationship with your former spouse. The skills required are:
Express desires, not complaints
Leaving emotions aside
Employing rational thought in making decisions
Dealing with problem, not the person
Brainstorm solutions together
Be willing to give up something, to get something
Talk about yourself, not the other person
Focus on facts, not motives
Accept emotional responsibility for yourself
Resist blaming other people and things
If you did not incorporate these skills into your divorcing situation, you can still do so now in order to forge a working relationship with your former spouse for the sake of your children. Not many people are capable of this type of relationship post-divorce. But don't let that dissuade you from trying. Every single person that has come through my program and commits to the mastering the skills above, is able to achieve this goal of co-parenting! Give it a try! Your children are worth it!